So here we are a few months later and no new posts. That cracks me up!! I feel as though I am constantly starting something new and then failing to follow through. It's one of the things that drives me absolutely crazy about myself. I can't be the only person that actually gets on their own nerves, or can I?
Since my last post we went on vacation and as I carried my lightest three year old up three flights of stairs I realized that I have GOT to do something about my weight and my health. I felt light headed and that combined with going from the bright Florida sun to the dark stairwell made me feel as though I might pass out with him in my arms. Terrifying. I joined weight watchers that night and the gym a few weeks later. I had a great couple weeks food wise and then fell off the wagon. And then tumbled down a hill into a lake. But, I am nothing if not optimistic that this time will be THE time and I am back on the horse as of today. My plan is to flood social media with meal pics and blog posts about my progress. Not necessarily so anyone will read them but so that I have a visual record of what worked and what didn't so that I can reevaluate my choices and keep moving forward. I would be lying if I didn't say that I am hoping to connect with others in the same struggle. I feel very alone when it comes to weight loss. I don't really like talking about it because it's a drag for the people around me and because I don't like feeling judged. My husband is naturally slim and fit. He works out everyday and is one of those people that needs it-craves it. His idea of hell is sitting around all day. He also has very healthy eating habits. If we have pizza he will go to the fridge and grab something green because balance. Whereas I wouldn't want to defile my taste buds and ruin the pizza experience.
Pre kids I was probably in the best shape of my life. I worked out regularly and dare I say, liked it? I am now 30+ lbs heavier and haven't worked out consistently in over four years. I was sick as a dog all through my pregnancy and then once the boys arrived there was just no time. Seriously. No time. Don't even give me that "no excuses" bullshit. If I have to choose between sleep and working out I am choosing sleep every single time with no regrets. It's vital to my mental health and to the happiness of my family. That's not an excuse, that's a fact. It's hard to "put yourself first" and all the crap I hear people spouting off about. Walk a mile in my shoes and then talk to me about excuses and putting myself first. Working full time, managing a house and raising two three year old boys is no joke and there is very little time for anything else. Once the kids are asleep I am D-O-N-E done. DONE. I have no mental or physical energy for much else than a shower and staring blankly at my iPad for a bit before passing out. I need that alone time so much. SO MUCH. As much as sleep. So nighttime workouts aren't on the menu. Morning workouts aren't on the menu. That leaves midday. Which, can be done but sometimes work gets in the way. Or the million things I need to get done in a week but can't do when the kids are at home. Errands that need running, etc. Sometimes, when I am clean and have clean hair for the first time in a few days like today (just keeping it real) there is no way in hell I am going to go to the gym for a workout I hate. Not happening. Hopefully my mindset will change but right now feeling clean and human is more important to me and let's be honest, you can't outwork a bad diet and that's where my priority is right now.
So, that's where I am right now. I have a big client meeting in three weeks and my one pair of meeting appropriate pants that did fit no longer do. My first small goal is to get back in those pants before my meeting. Totally doable.
Since my last post we went on vacation and as I carried my lightest three year old up three flights of stairs I realized that I have GOT to do something about my weight and my health. I felt light headed and that combined with going from the bright Florida sun to the dark stairwell made me feel as though I might pass out with him in my arms. Terrifying. I joined weight watchers that night and the gym a few weeks later. I had a great couple weeks food wise and then fell off the wagon. And then tumbled down a hill into a lake. But, I am nothing if not optimistic that this time will be THE time and I am back on the horse as of today. My plan is to flood social media with meal pics and blog posts about my progress. Not necessarily so anyone will read them but so that I have a visual record of what worked and what didn't so that I can reevaluate my choices and keep moving forward. I would be lying if I didn't say that I am hoping to connect with others in the same struggle. I feel very alone when it comes to weight loss. I don't really like talking about it because it's a drag for the people around me and because I don't like feeling judged. My husband is naturally slim and fit. He works out everyday and is one of those people that needs it-craves it. His idea of hell is sitting around all day. He also has very healthy eating habits. If we have pizza he will go to the fridge and grab something green because balance. Whereas I wouldn't want to defile my taste buds and ruin the pizza experience.
Pre kids I was probably in the best shape of my life. I worked out regularly and dare I say, liked it? I am now 30+ lbs heavier and haven't worked out consistently in over four years. I was sick as a dog all through my pregnancy and then once the boys arrived there was just no time. Seriously. No time. Don't even give me that "no excuses" bullshit. If I have to choose between sleep and working out I am choosing sleep every single time with no regrets. It's vital to my mental health and to the happiness of my family. That's not an excuse, that's a fact. It's hard to "put yourself first" and all the crap I hear people spouting off about. Walk a mile in my shoes and then talk to me about excuses and putting myself first. Working full time, managing a house and raising two three year old boys is no joke and there is very little time for anything else. Once the kids are asleep I am D-O-N-E done. DONE. I have no mental or physical energy for much else than a shower and staring blankly at my iPad for a bit before passing out. I need that alone time so much. SO MUCH. As much as sleep. So nighttime workouts aren't on the menu. Morning workouts aren't on the menu. That leaves midday. Which, can be done but sometimes work gets in the way. Or the million things I need to get done in a week but can't do when the kids are at home. Errands that need running, etc. Sometimes, when I am clean and have clean hair for the first time in a few days like today (just keeping it real) there is no way in hell I am going to go to the gym for a workout I hate. Not happening. Hopefully my mindset will change but right now feeling clean and human is more important to me and let's be honest, you can't outwork a bad diet and that's where my priority is right now.
So, that's where I am right now. I have a big client meeting in three weeks and my one pair of meeting appropriate pants that did fit no longer do. My first small goal is to get back in those pants before my meeting. Totally doable.
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